LOVE & FORGIVENESS

I've been thinking about various issues to do with myself, my family, my friends, and the larger national community. Many conversations and thoughts have come up about love and forgiveness. I'm reminded of this Latin tattoo that a certain celebrity has on her stomach, which when translated means "that which feeds me, destroys me". Now while that was esoteric to me at one time, more recently it has started to make sense. I think love could be quantified at the top of the list of things that while it does feed us, it can also destroy us.  Love is patient - yet, not always tolerating.  Love is forgiving - yet, not forgetful. Love protects - yet, controls. Love gives - yet, takes. We have all at some point in our lives either betrayed love or been betrayed by it. Maybe both. And while it hurts incredibly to be betrayed, there is a lifelong scar instilled in our hearts when we've become the betrayer. I don't necessarily mean in a romantic relationship, though I imagine this is the first situation that comes to mind. It can also happen among friends. It can happen within an organization, like one's employment company, or more importantly for others, their religion. When someone has betrayed you, you have the power. The power to forgive and maybe - just maybe - do the nearly impossible and forget. The person you once trusted was like a white wall, and when they betrayed and wronged you, it was as though mud was slung on that white wall. Eventually, the mud will come off, but the stain of it will always be on that once pure white wall. The more you forgive, the whiter it becomes again. Only you can cleanse that person of the spot. Ultimately, our universal God and Creator (on the assumption you believe in God and that He cares) has the power to do that for us all. However, on a personal basis, we can each do that for one another when given the opportunity, albeit painful. In a sense, you can be like God, when you are faced with the circumstance of having to forgive someone for betrayal. But when you have done the wrong, it is not just a spot. It is a dent forever on your heart. If you slam a hammer into an oak table and cause a dent, that blemish will always be there. You can polish and polish and polish and refine, but it is nearly impossible to have that dent removed. It eventually becomes part of the character of that piece of furniture, and the owner will eventually become accustomed to that dent and forget about it...but from time-to-time, they will be reminded: that dent is still there. THIS is what it is like for someone who is unable to forgive themselves.

I am reminded of a valuable piece of art (I believe it was a work by Vincent van Gogh but not completely sure) that was indemnified after almost being destroyed. Was it thrown away? No longer considered valuable because of the flaws that had become a part of it? No! Art lovers saw this tragic piece of work for the invaluable treasure it was and large amounts of money went towards its restoration, and it is now on display at the Louvre in France for others to continue to enjoy.

Another example. Which would you find more fascinating and worth holding onto: a piece of gold that had already been refined and polished and shaped into fine jewelry and then given to you as a gift or a rough gold nugget found while panning a river, that you discovered yourself, and could truly call all your own? Sure you'd have to get rid of most of the rock and gravel and dross that came up with the gold. In fact, there would likely be more of that refuse than actual precious metal, but would you dump the whole pan out, gold nugget and all, just because of the garbage you didn't like that came up with it? Or would you pick out that dull, rough piece of metal and refine it and polish it with the love of your heart until it became the beautiful element you knew it could be? Well, this is what it should be like when we view someone we love! Don't look at the person with the expectation that he or she should always be shiny and clean and dent-free, but rather look at that person with the view that potentially this is what that person can eventually be for us with the endurance of love! And more importantly, this is how we should see ourselves.

No one ever applauds the mountain climber who falls and then just climbs all the way back down to first base without trying to finish the fight. We applaud and cheer the climber who has fallen - near to his death - but struggles to get up, scratched and all, and finishes!

Never quit. Despite what critical expectations others may hold us to. Despite what impossible expectations we hold ourselves to.

You are that original work of art too valuable for price. I am that rough, unhewn gold nugget encrusted with refuse that I cannot break away from without help. We ALL have the potential to be that climber who has fallen but gets up and finishes. God has given us that opportunity. Use it and enjoy it.